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The desire to do something we know isn’t ideal for us can be strong, and the inevitable cycle of having a craving, fighting it, giving in, then feeling guilty can be a miserable experience. But what if there was a better way?
Cravings are normal and natural, and no one will ever be able to simply go through life without ever having urges. There are different ways to manage your cravings in a healthier manner, and one of them is called urge surfing. It has gained a lot of popularity for its simplicity and ability for anyone to try it in their daily life.
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Understanding Urges and Urge Surfing
We can crave almost anything that leads to our brain producing happy chemicals, from foods to behaviors to drugs. “Urges and cravings are deeply intertwined with the brain’s reward system,” explains NYC Neuropsychologist and Director of Comprehend the Mind Dr. Sanam Hafeez.
She says that “this system, centered around neural pathways and neurotransmitters such as dopamine, forms associations between specific actions or substances and pleasurable or relieving sensations,” and “when we engage in behaviors that activate this reward system, dopamine levels rise, reinforcing the connection between the behavior and the positive outcome.”
These associations become deeply ingrained, leading to the development of cravings or urges as our brain seeks out the familiar pleasure or relief.
The more we deny ourselves what we’re craving, the more prone we are to do exactly that, in the short term. Food cravings, for example, may be very intense in the early stages of a restricted eating plan, but have been shown to lessen over time. Stress can also worsen our cravings, as has been shown to be the case with drugs.
If we can just get through a craving without giving in to it, and provide ourselves the proper self-care in the interim, the craving will eventually pass. Enter urge surfing, which empowers you to do exactly that. It’s a mental technique in which you reframe your craving into a wave, visually and emotionally. That wave will come towards you, crest, and recede. When it has passed, your craving will have subsided.
Benefits of Urge Surfing
Urge surfing is great because it’s free, straightforward, and takes up no physical space. Rather, it’s an emotional exercise that you can in your own mind. “Urge surfing cultivates mindfulness, fostering awareness of the present moment and one’s inner experiences,” says Hafeez. She adds that “this helps individuals to regain control over their responses to temptation, facilitating conscious choices that align with their long-term goals and values.”
This process can lead you to become more in control over your own life. You’re choosing to witness your cravings, and that emotional distance is healthy for you to experience.
It can lead you to better understand that we are not our emotions, we just have them, and that distance can be excellent for your ability to control your impulses, whether they are cravings or other potentially unhealthy behavior.
The process of urge surfing can help you become mentally and emotionally stronger overall, as mindfulness practices generally aim to. “By teaching individuals to ride out the waves of their urges without yielding to them, urge surfing promotes resilience and equips them with healthier coping mechanisms,” says Hafeez.
Steps to Practice Urge Surfing
Urge surfing can be performed in a few short steps. It’s all about realizing what’s going on, letting yourself feel it, then moving on.
Recognize
First you need to become aware that you’re experiencing a craving. “Begin by recognizing the presence of the urge without judgment or resistance,” says Hafeez.
This will help you accept the fact that you are experiencing it. Sit with your acceptance for a moment, realizing that the craving is happening and you are about to move through it.
Observe
Now you’ll want to witness your craving. “Tune into the physical sensations, thoughts, and emotions associated with the urge,” suggests Hafeez. She urges us to “notice where in your body you feel the sensations most strongly.
Observe any accompanying thoughts or urges without getting caught up in them. Remember that you are simply observing these experiences without needing to act on them.” This may be hard the first times you do it, as we aren’t accustomed to considering our emotions separate from ourselves.
Visualize
Here is where you’ll be picturing a literal wave. Hafeez says to “visualize the urge as a wave in the ocean, rising in intensity before eventually cresting and subsiding.” She suggests you “picture yourself riding this wave, allowing it to peak without giving in to impulsive actions.”
As you’re doing that, she wants you to “remind yourself that urges, like waves, are temporary and will eventually pass if you allow them to.”
Return to the Present
In a matter of minutes, your craving will begin to pass. “As the urge begins to subside, gently bring your awareness back to the present moment,” instructs Hafeez. To do that, “shift your focus to your surroundings, the sensations in your body, or the rhythm of your breath.”
Once you have completed these steps, sit for a moment or two in what you have just gone through. You successfully rode out a craving, which is quite a feat! You should be proud of yourself, knowing that not only have you made a healthy choice, you’ve also become that much more emotionally and mentally strong.
Tips for Effective Urge Surfing
To get the most out of urge surfing, and to have the best success with it, try these tips.
- Learn about your cravings. Hafeez explains that it’s important to know what triggers your cravings. “For effective urge surfing, it’s crucial to cultivate self-awareness by identifying your specific triggers and patterns associated with cravings,” she says.
- Recognize what a craving looks and feels like for you. The more familiar you are with your cravings, the better you can manage them. “Practice recognizing the early signs of cravings, such as changes in mood or thoughts, to intervene before they escalate,” she says.
- Don’t be judgmental about your cravings. “When engaging in urge surfing, adopt a curious and non-judgmental attitude toward your cravings, allowing yourself to observe them without feeling the need to act on them immediately,” she recommends.
Applying Urge Surfing in Daily Life
It’s up to you how much you want to incorporate urge surfing into your daily life, but as with all mindfulness practices, the more you do it, the more natural it will become. In turn, it will require less and less thought and effort over time.
If there is a pattern to your cravings, that’s a great place to start. For example, if you find yourself tempted by dessert after dinner but know that sugar sits badly in your stomach, you can spend some time acknowledging the upcoming craving before you even sit down to the table. Or if you don’t drink but are going to spend time at a bar, you can practice urge surfing in advance to get familiar with the process before you enter the space.
Hafeez recommends a dedicated time of day for a mindfulness routine, on a regular basis. “Start by setting aside dedicated time each day for mindfulness practice, whether it’s in the morning before starting your day or in the evening before bed,” she recommends.
Alternatively, she says you can integrate a mindfulness practice into other routines of your throughout the day, if you aren’t prone to wanting to set aside separate time for it. “Integrate urge surfing into existing routines, such as during breaks at work or before meals, to make it a natural part of your day,” she suggests.
When Not to Urge Surge
Because your cravings might be for things that can alter your mind or your health, safety is key. For example, if you have larger issues around food and want to use urge surfing to get past simple hunger cravings for food because you aren’t eating enough, you’ll want to seek care for eating disorders.
Professional assistance may also be the better answer if you’re using urge surfing to manage a drug issue. “If you’re experiencing severe withdrawal symptoms or medical emergencies related to addiction, urge surfing may not be sufficient to address the immediate needs of your situation,” explains Hafeez.
She also notes that drug cravings can impact both your safety and that of those around you. “If you’re in an environment where your safety or the safety of others is at risk due to your cravings, seek immediate professional help rather than relying on urge surfing,” she says.
The Bottom Line
For everyday cravings that we don’t want to give in to, urge surfing is a great option. It’s the process of visualizing your craving as a wave, and witnessing it rise, crest, and fall. A mindfulness practice, urge surfing allows you to step back from your emotions and have more control over your actions.
It can be done in a few simple steps, and can be integrated into your life on a daily basis. That said, it should never be used in place of medical care. If you’ve been experiencing cravings, it’s the perfect time to give urge surfing a try.
