Such contrasting reactions to stress are a familiar sight in workplaces and households alike. The truth is, these behavioural patterns are far more common than we may care to admit. Are these differences shaped by societal roles, inherent tendencies, or perhaps both? Are women simply ‘wired for worry’, or is there something deeper at play?
BasilTree Consulting carried out the first comprehensive study of over 10,000 managers in India, shedding new light on this intriguing dynamic. The findings echo global trends: women, in general, display greater anxiety and lower stress tolerance compared to men, who seem better equipped to handle high-pressure situations. This gap in emotional resilience isn’t just anecdotal. It’s borne out in multiple highly respected and validated personality instruments, reinforcing what many of us have long suspected.
Biologically different
Yet, the question persists—are these differences biologically ingrained, or do they result from centuries of societal conditioning? A compelling argument points to biology. Evolutionarily, women have long been the primary caregivers, responsible for nurturing offspring, ensuring their safety, and attending to their well-being. These caregiving roles may have required a heightened sense of awareness—an instinct to anticipate potential risks and threats. Women, therefore, might have developed higher levels of anxiety as a survival mechanism. Higher concentrations of oxytocin and cortisol, hormones that influence emotional bonding and stress response, may also play a part in making women more susceptible to worry.
But the story doesn’t end there. If biology sets the stage, society certainly amplifies the performance. From an early age, girls are often conditioned to be nurturing, cautious, and emotionally responsive, while boys are stereotypically enough, taught to be tough, assertive, and emotionally stoic. Think of all the times little girls have been praised for being ‘well-behaved’ or ‘sensible,’ while boys are encouraged to be brave and adventurous. These social cues, along with the media’s portrayal of women as emotional and men as resilient, reinforce behaviours that mirror the very traits we associate with anxiety and stress tolerance.
Take a look around your workplace or even reflect on your own career. Women’s heightened anxiety often makes them detail-oriented and empathetic, attributes that can be highly valuable in roles requiring collaboration and people management. In many ways, this makes women exceptional leaders in industries that demand a human touch. However, this same anxiety can also be a double-edged sword, potentially leading to burnout, self-doubt, and hesitation when it comes to stepping into high-pressure leadership roles. It’s no coincidence that impostor syndrome—where capable individuals feel like frauds despite their achievements—disproportionately affects women. Could this underlying anxiety be one reason why so many promising female professionals stall mid-career?
Emotional vulnerability
Men, on the other hand, with their generally higher tolerance for stress, are often the ones stepping into the breach when rapid decision-making and crisis management are required. Their resilience can be a tremendous asset, allowing them to excel in high-stakes environments. But here too, the story isn’t as simple as it seems. While men may be better equipped to handle stress, this often comes at the cost of emotional vulnerability. A man who suppresses his emotions may find himself disconnected from colleagues, partners, or even his own mental health, leading to a different set of challenges altogether.
These patterns aren’t just academic curiosities—they play out in very real ways in our daily lives. Working women, in particular, often find themselves pulled in different directions, weighed down by what sociologists call the ‘second shift.’ After a full day of work, many women return home only to shoulder the lion’s share of domestic responsibilities. For some, the pressure becomes too much. Over 40% of highly qualified women with children leave their jobs at some point in their careers, most between the ages of 30 and 44. A recent study in India revealed that over a third of working women cite work-life balance as the reason for their exit, compared to a mere 4% of men. These figures tell a stark story: women are bearing a disproportionate burden, and it’s costing them their careers.
Challenge the traditional gender roles
But does it have to be this way? What if we reimagined our societal and organisational structures to better support both men and women in navigating these challenges?
For one, we could challenge the traditional gender roles that assign caregiving responsibilities almost exclusively to women. Imagine a world where men are equally encouraged to take on these roles, not just in the home but in the workplace too. What if we normalised emotional vulnerability for men, allowing them to express the same fears and anxieties without fear of judgement? It would not only lighten the load for women but also create a more emotionally intelligent workforce where both men and women could thrive.
Organisations to play a crucial role
Organisations have an equally crucial role to play. What if they prioritised mental health resources and created a culture that supports both genders in managing stress and anxiety? Flexible working arrangements, parental leave, and mentorship programmes specifically designed for women could help retain female talent. And what if men were equally encouraged to take advantage of these policies? Would that help break down the rigid gender divisions we see today?
The good news is that some organisations are already making strides in this direction. Yet, we still have a long way to go. In many places, the old stereotypes of the worrying woman and the stress-tolerant man remain firmly entrenched. But they don’t have to. By addressing both the biological and societal factors at play, we can begin to dismantle these outdated narratives. The question is: are we ready to make that change?
In the end, recognising that both men and women have distinct strengths—and vulnerabilities—allows us to build more inclusive, supportive environments. The goal shouldn’t be to erase these differences, but to ensure that neither gender is held back by them. Only then can we create a world where success isn’t dictated by outdated expectations, but by the talents and aspirations of every individual.
—The authors; Dr. Srinath Sridharan (@ssmumbai) is a Policy Researcher & Corporate advisor, and Bhawana Mishra is Founder of BasilTree Consulting. The views expressed are personal.
