DINKs, or Dual Income No Kids relationships are on the rise among Filipinos.
In a 2023 study focusing on couples in Quezon City, researchers found the primary factors why couples decide to be in a DINK relationship are “due to unpleasant upbringing,” “prioritizing self-growth,” and “maintaining great importance to their careers.”
Meanwhile, a 2023 survey conducted by online dating app Bumble through Milieu Insights Pte Ltd. found 59% of single Filipinos are considering a child-free lifestyle, with 62% of women being more likely to be interested in a DINK relationship than 55% of men.
Rolled out online from September 21-26, 2023 to a total of 500 single Filipinos aged 18-43, the study showed that 60% of those surveyed stated they “value the freedom to travel and pursue hobbies” without childcare constraints, while 56% prioritize “career advancement and personal goals.”
Apart from personal reasons, sociologist Dr. Gerald S. Abergos said global influences have also impacted life-partnership decisions. Media and globalization have exposed people to diverse cultures and lifestyles, prompting them to reevaluate their family plans.
“Marrying-age couples now have more access to graduate school education, which creates better career opportunities and reshapes traditional family roles,” Abergos told GMA News Online.
Besides, “The rising cost of living is undoubtedly a major reason for this change,” Abergos added.
“Given the economic challenges and opportunities in the Philippines, many couples find the DINK lifestyle appealing because it offers financial stability and personal fulfillment,” the sociologist said.
But it’s not all that fun and games. Abergos said “Choosing not to have children can lead to lack of support in old age and potentially social isolation.”
“The traditional extended family network may weaken, and there can be societal pressures and stigma associated with not having children,” he added, pointing to the usual prying questions from nosy titas during Christmas family reunions.
GMA News Online spoke with three DINK couples about what prompted them to be child-free, the best thing about this lifestyle, as well as the challenges it imposes.
Jeneeva Bispo and Roni Reyes
Before tying the knot in March 2023, Jeneeva Bispo and Roni Reyes had mutually decided not to have kids.
“Our goal is to continue working towards financial freedom and travel to our dream destinations,” Jeneeva said.
The couple believes that a child deserves to be born in this world with parents who are confident about raising one.
“We don’t want to give birth to a child half-heartedly just because society expects us to,” she said.
“Right now, we are still building our lives together as a married couple, and we’re savoring each second of it, just us two,” she added.
Being a DINK couple allows Jeneeva and Roni to fulfill their dreams of traveling together without worrying about anyone else. But this doesn’t mean they don’t face challenges over this decision.
Roni said the most challenging part of being in a DINK household is explaining to their loved ones, especially to their parents, why they don’t want to get pregnant.
“We know that our families mean well when they ask us about having kids, but that’s not enough for us to be all in when it comes to creating a family,” Roni said.
Although they understand that not everyone will agree with their childless lifestyle, the couple couldn’t be bothered.
“To each their own,” Jeneeva said. “We don’t advocate our preferences in our marriage to others.”
Anna Kahayon and Raffy Tecson
Anna Kahayon and Raffy Tecson have been married for six years, living their best lives as a DINK couple.
When they got married, they focused on the basics checklist: build a home, purchase cars, increase savings, get insurance, and keep themselves healthy.
“For us to do all these, we made sure we’re doing well in our respective careers,” Anna said.
“We wanted to make sure that as individuals and as a married couple, we are well enough to live a comfortable life,” she added.
Like Jeneeva and Roni, the married couple finds the freedom to do whatever they want, whenever they want, to be the most rewarding part of being a child-free couple.
“Also, peace of mind for not being responsible for another human being’s life,” Anna said.
“We’re both not sure if we’re mentally, physically, and emotionally ready to be parents,” she added. “Plus, we don’t know what kind of future the kid will face regarding education, environment, and health.”
Despite Anna and Raffy not having kids, they respect other couples’ decisions about having children.
“People have different priorities and beliefs,” Anne said. “We’re not forcing anyone to understand that this is the life and marriage we have and want.”
“The important thing is that my husband and I are aligned and support each other in our decisions,” she added.
Belle Rodolfo and Deng Garcia
Belle Rodolfo and Deng Garcia discussed the decision not to have kids early on in their four-year relationship.
“We’ve both decided on this separately, even before we met,” Belle said.
As a queer couple, the beauty editor also said they get a lot of comments from people saying they can’t have kids anyway since they are in a gay relationship, but Belle said it’s still a choice they can make for themselves.
“A lot of gay people have kids, actually!” She said.
As a DINK couple, the most rewarding part for Belle and Deng is being able to invest their time and resources in the things they love, including hobbies, traveling, learning, pets, and spoiling their families.
“I know traditional people will always ask, ‘Who will take care of you when you’re old?’,” Belle said. “But I’ve seen child-free relatives supported even as they age.”
The couple also strongly believes in living their lives without pleasing others.
“Being child-free is a choice available to you as much as parenthood is,” Belle said.
— LA, GMA Integrated News
